I just had a birthday the other day. The big 47. Not that 47 is bigger than any other birthday I suppose, but I subscribe to the theory that every birthday is a big birthday. And not just because it's better than the alternative of not having a birthday. But birthdays are a day to celebrate being you. Being here. Being whatever it is you want to be. And wearing a tiara. Always a tiara...
As I was celebrating all things Carol, I took notice of some things around me that anyone with significantly fewer years on this earth wouldn't appreciate. And it's starting to dawn on me how my parents felt when growing up I said things like "what do you mean phones used to have cranks??". I would have hit me, but Stella and Bob had much more patience than that...and Scotch Old-Fashions...
I remember in high school and college going up and down the bleachers at basketball games or assemblies and fearing to my very quick stumbling and falling down to the floor most likely arriving in a heap of broken bones and embarrassment. I watched every step. Now kids go up and down bleacher steps with earbuds in rocking out to their favorite indy band while texting on their phone AND holding a conversation with the person next to them. I can't even do that on a flat surface. Oh, who am I kidding. I can't do all three of those things at once under any circumstances.
It used to be the only people talking with acronyms and abbreviations in conversation were twins using their weird twin language and run of the mill schizophrenics. Now if you don't know what ROTFL and LOL are, forget it.
Taking movies at Christmas these days involves nothing more than pulling your phone out of your jammies and pushing a button. Embarrassing family videos are as easy as documenting anti-government uprisings. But back in my day, Christmas morning wasn't Christmas morning without a light bar emitting 2000 degrees of searing bulb induced heat, a wobbly hand held movie camera, lots of squinting and at least one person on the verge of tears because the movies are taking too long and there are presents to open!! Not that I ever felt that way or anything...
Voicemail wasn't invented. You got an illegible hand written note or, if you were really into technology, you had a answering machine with two cassette tapes just waiting to get wound around the inner workings of the gizmo. And speaking of cassette tapes, when was the last time you saw one totally unwound on the side of the road? Good times...
Printing a document meant you didn't use cursive.
Nothing came in a safety tamper resistant package. If someone wanted to tamper with your Tylenol or your toothpaste, they did. If you didn't want your kids to take your medication, you hid it.
I could go on and on. But instead I think I'll have an old-fashion instead.
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